27 March 06 - 22:42Women's Room Action

I ran across this picture which made me feel a little bit better after an embarrassing experiance Sunday. My honey and I were shopping at Costco and I headed for the bathroom to wash my hands. Once in the restroom I noticed a woman on my left, also washing up. I thought that a bit strange but shrugged it off. Still washing I noticed in the mirror a woman coming out of a bathroom stall. "Strange," I thought, "I can't believe there would be not one, but two women in the men's room." I turned around and looked for urinals. Missing!!! I turned back and continued turning until I was looking in the face of the woman to my left. "Am I in the wrong place?" I asked. "Yes," she stated simply, looking at me like I was completely nuts. At this point I decided to finish washing up in the men's room which I found next door. On the way there another woman coming in as I was going out did a double take on me and then looked again at the sign on the door to make sure it was me and not her in the "stupid zone." Who's looking stupid now, eh, Superman?!?

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27 March 06 - 20:04Die on Vacation? No Longer a Problem for Aruba Tourists

Good News from Aruba!! Recent indications from Aruba are that Natalie was not murdered! She simply accidently drugged and drank herself to death. The "boys" did not rape her and kill her. They simply had the misfortune of raping her when she happened to die, after all. Not to worry. These civic minded boys realized what a plight it would be with a dead girl laying around, so they provided that little bit extra and buried her. This is another reason why you should travel to Aruba. Say you are drinking heavily and your drink gets spiked. "Oh, my!" you think, "What will happen to my dead body if I die of an unexpected overdose? How embarrasing to be laying around dead!" Calm down, look around you. Those Arubans you are with will have your body in a nice tidy grave before dawn!! Then to make sure you don't cause any trouble, they will come back and dispose of you in a more permanent manner as soon as it is convenient for them. Now you can rest assured in Aruba!

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26 March 06 - 11:38Poor Service Amusement

Here you can see what the label looked like on the package mentioned in the previous entry. The fellow that sent me the package cut himself a label which looked exactly like the raised image hovering over a complete priority mail label, only it had his address and mine on it. How could a postal employee interpret both of these labels as the same? And, after it took the package 8 days to be delivered, how could they interpret the service provided as "Priority?" Maybe they were not able to do the arithmetic on the dates. Sometimes a person smart enough to detect label remnants is not as well equipped to do other technical things, like subtracting the date on the postmark with the current date. I know all of you will argue with me, tell me I am nuts, there isn't anything to this....... However, I think the US Postal Service is poorly managed and is not run well. If you agree with me, since USPS is an independently run entity under the control of the executive branch of our government, take time to send George Bush an email or letter to let him know. Lord knows he must be bored silly with the lack of activity in Washington these days.

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25 March 06 - 15:05Let's Play Post Office

"Neither rain nor hail nor sleet nor snow nor heat of day nor dark of night shall keep this carrier from the swift completion of his appointed rounds." -- Herodotus, Greek Philosopher - 500 BC This quote in modern (not present) times became the motto of the United States Postal Service. It seems that even in Norman Rockwell's time the motto may not have been appropriate, a miniature copy of a former Saturday Evening Post cover reveals a somewhat slovenly image of a postal worker reading a postcard before delivering it. By the way, I don't think the grammar of the quote is correct as neither implies comparison between two noun phrases. I'll check that out later. First, this. Today was my lucky day. I had to go to the post office and get a package that could not be delivered for insufficient postage. First the explanation of the postage issue. The person mailing the package had cut out the "To-From" portion of a priority delivery label. Even though the only printing on the lable was To: and From:, NOTHING ELSE, not even lines, I needed to pay extra because the local postal folks in Plano, TX said the label required extra postage for extra special delivery. Apparently the hicks in the Pennsylvania post office should have known better as they were the ones that printed the postage sticker on the package. It took 8 calendar days for the package to get here, 9 days, actually, since I had to go and pay extra the day after it actually arrived. This package was from Pennsylvania, maybe it was Amish special handling and they trotted out in a buggy. What a joke. Extra money because the sender cut the center portion out of a priority label and the Pennsylvania postal guys (and gals) charged only for Parcel Post. Perhaps, you think to yourself, the Post Office in good old area code 75075 is more professionally run than the post office in area code 18901 (Doylestown, PA). Think again. It took me over 30 minutes in line to get to the window to get charged extra and recieve the speedy delivery package. During that stay a postal employee stood alongside the line for 20 minutes getting heckled by disgruntled folks in line. He was asked by one woman if he could, perhaps, instead of showing people how to fill out paperwork while waiting in line he could go and retrieve some packages and mail from the back room. "No, I need to stay out here because in 15 minutes I have to close that gate and tell people the post office is closed." I don't think he would have been late for his very important date even if he had gone back and retrieved packages. Oh, yes, the line was just as long when they "locked" the gate as when I had arrived 30 minutes earlier. Next time we chat about postal service, I'll mention how a strategically placed car can do what neither rain, nor hail, nor sleet could do. Yup, if done right it can stop the carrier from the swift completion of his appointed rounds. Actually, he finishes the rounds just fine, he just fails to deliver the mail. I have to go, I have magazines the post office delivered to me by mistake that I need to take to two different neighbors. One guy has the same last name and the other a similar (not the same) house number.

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19 March 06 - 23:28Empty Nest Children

Once the kids are gone you need things to entertain you in a way the kids haven't since they were kids.

The secret, I have learned, is to have TWO dogs. By having two dogs you can have the pleasure of having them fight, just like kids!! AND, you can have the fun of a baby by getting a puppy (the smaller of the two is a puppy).

By getting a puppy, you can have the fun of cleaning up bodily fluids and semi-solids as the "cute" creature learns where to "go."

Remember, the big dog is Anabel and the little dog is Rugberry.

We are having doggy style fun with out new "kids"!

More on this situation later.

Stay tuned.

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17 March 06 - 23:38Consciousness

Can reality exist without consciousness? One of the clever philosophical or probably more precisely, logic questions that junior high science teachers as their students is based on the definition of sound. The definition of sound is simply "the perception of vibrations stimulating the ear." Noting that we need to have not only vibrations and stimulation of the ear, we require "perception" the question asked is this, "If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, did it make a sound?" Correct answer, "No." Reason? There was not a perceotion of the sonic waves (vibrations) to give us the final element of the definition of sound. Now back to The original question; "Can reality exist without consciousness?" Better yet, "is anything truely real unless it is percieved?" or simply, "what is reality?" Ah yes, the question of the ages. You decide. Perception IS reality, they say.

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16 March 06 - 01:22Al Qaida Manifesto

I am on the way to the sack, but you have to see these links. The United States has just released (unclassified) documents that are related to "operation Iraqi Freedom." I will be reading this one in detail. It is Al-Qa’ida Bylaws. Here are two links for you. The first is the Federal Military Studies Offfice - Joint Reserve Intelligence Center web URL for the entire load of documents just released. The second is the direct link to the Al-Qa’ida Bylaws. I am mulling over storing some of these on the website, but for now; here are the links. FMSO Documents regarding Operation Iraqi Freedom Al-Qa’ida Bylaws (English Translation)

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14 March 06 - 23:10Erinnerungen an die Zukunft

I have been watching "The History Channel" which is featuring a night of programming on UFO's and what they might be. Currently the program is pondering the possibility that angels and visions in the bible (Ezekial, et al) are visitors from another planet. I guess it could work either way. Angels are UFO's or UFO's are angels. Some many years ago I was impressed by a paperback book I bought titled "Chariots of the Gods." You know, there are many strange things on this earth. The pyramids, the sphinx, patterns on the ground in South America, Inca codics, Those dopey looking statues "guarding" Easter Island, the Stonehenge, are all evidence of things that have been designed and built in the past. In many cases there are aspects of the structures that are difficult to understand. Perhaps these structures are guides for these chariots of the gods (flying saucers) or maybe the flying saucers are angels from God. I'll have to ponder that one. Perhaps I'll call Sheryl Crow and ask her. It seems she did a song one time called "Maybe Angels." I wonder what an archeologist from the future would think if they dug up Washington, DC 5000 years in the future. It would seem that they would decide all of the buildings were churches and religious buildings. Who would ever think that a great civilization would spend all that time and energy building all of those buildings just to house a bunch of overpaid under utilized bureaucrats to mess with the lives of the citizenry. Hmmmm. It is time for me to log off and "ponder the past" some more.

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11 March 06 - 11:09A Good Time was had by All

Here are two names I never thought I would write in the same sentence. Zooey Deschanel and Terry Bradshaw are great in Failure to Launch. Roger Ebert only gave this show a single star, and I have learned to trust his judgement. I agree with his assessment here ==> Rogers review of "Launch". If you don't know what the show is about, read Roger's review. Although his review is technically correct, the movie is a much better time than the single star implies. I liked the fact that the movie made me laugh, didn't try to persuade me how to think, and made me feel good. Sometimes folks that review movies forget that the plot in a comedy is merely a vehicle for the gags and jokes. As long as the movie's plot is reasonably plausible and fun, it is a great container for a good time. Go to this movie and enjoy the great character that Zooey Deschanel creates, and see the only guy that I have seen recently that can get a laugh just by flashing his butt. Terry Bradshaw was great in this movie. He was a perfect choice for the part. Just enough overacting to make things funny, not enough to mess up the movie. Terry is so recognizable (at least to me) that he comes across as "Terry Bradshaw" no matter what part he might be playing. If I were a Hollywood producer, I would get all of the Zooey and Terry I could in my next movie. They are great for different reasons. Zooey is a technician in the art of acting who makes you believe she is what she is protraying. Terry Bradshaw is Terry Bradshaw and that is enough.

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06 March 06 - 23:36Whine Whine Whine

I have been reading reactions to "Brokeback Mountain" and the fact that "Crash" won the Oscar where "Brokeback" didn't. It would seem that the low budget film "Brokeback Mountain" was more successful than I would have thought at 3 Oscars out of 8 nominations. For the discriminating reader, here are some interesting facts. Sunday's Academy Awards telecast averaged 38.8 million viewers, down nearly 8 percent from last year. "March of the Penguins" made $77 million during its theatrical run while "Brokeback" has earned $76 million in ticket sales to date with $25 million of that after the Oscar nomination announcements. Usually Oscar winners are not the big film of the year, but usually they make the category of "blockbuster." This year none of the films nominated hit the $100,000,000 mark considered to be a blockbuster. However, even at that, the films nominated this year are probably the weakest group at the boxoffice ever to be nominated. Usually they are over $100 million. None of these babies made it. I might propose, however, it was not a good year for good movies.

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06 March 06 - 22:50The New Look

Marla and others have less than complimentary things to say since I shaved my beard.

I will get a picture posted later this week.

I shaved off the beard, and left the mustache.

The lovely Marla thinks I look like the conductor from "North Pole Express" while a friend at work says I look like Charley Weaver.

I am trying to decide if either is desirable, although I think the conductor on the "Express" was Tom Hanks, and that can't be that bad, can it?

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05 March 06 - 13:45Its Oscar Night

This past year I went to more movies in the theaters than any other time of my life since I was a kid. Yet I did not see one of the movies nominated for an Oscar this year. However, my viewing habits aside, with "Good Night and Good Luck", "Crash", "Munich", "Brokeback Mountain" and "Capote" listed as candidates for best picture you might be asking, how can I possibly say what I am going to say... I am going to say, "I am not going to watch the "Oscars" tonight." Of course, there are other awards. If you would like to see what is up for grabs (no pun intended with the likes of "Brokeback" in the running) here is the ABC Official Ballot for you to look over. Actually, I have not seen a single moview that was nominated. I have read Truman Capote's books, but have no interest in his life or lifestyle. I have not been out on the range grabbing a bucket of lard from the chuckwagon to head for the bushes with another cowboy, nor have I any desire to see others do it. I will watch Munich on DVD later. I like Johnny Cash, but after seeing "Coal Miner's Daughter" some years back, I have no interest in seeing how country and western stars live, in this case, how John and June lived their lives. I do like Sissy Spacek, however, so the former film was worth it from that aspect. That leaves "Crash" and "Good Night and Good Luck" to consider. Crash is a complex police story involving racial themes. The plot did not capture my interest and I have waited for someone to tell me it is a must see, but that has not happened. "Good Night and Good Luck" is described as well put together, but boring. If the movie is factual enough, perhaps it can get a place in educational institutions when McCarthyism is being studied. I have not heard anyone attest to its accuracy. This is the sorriest group of movies up for awards that I have every seen. Those of you who watch, let me know if you enjoyed the awards show!!

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04 March 06 - 21:51Hunting the little Duckies

In North Dakota a hunter's shotgun holds three shells. Shotgun shells come in a variety of configurations. Although I am not an expert, I can tell you that the differences among shell configurations are determined by both the power behind the shot and the size of the pellets. When you hunt ducks and geese, you use large pellets and a "magnum" gunpowder load. This is because they are large birds and are often at fairly long range. 30 to 50 yards is a long shot with a shotgun and a shot over 50 yards is probably lucky. When you hunt quail you use smaller pellets and less powerful gunpowder loads. The reason is that your shooting opportunities are close range and very small birds. Some years ago I lived in North Dakota and every fall I would hunt geese or ducks or both. At that time goose hunting ended at 1:00 PM and we would continue the day with duck hunting. On a particular Saturday my hunting partner and I had received permission to hunt ducks on private posted property. After crawling and slithering up to a small slough (pond) with ducks on it we executed a plan to split up while counting to 100, jump up to scare the ducks into the air, and shoot them. Eating was to occur later in the day. As I was counting, I heard the ducks wings flapping. The ducks were taking off early. I jumped up and saw my friend, Phil, also jumping up to shoot. I shot one duck, swung left, sighted another duck and shot a second time, picked a third duck swung to lead him and as I prepared to shoot and stopped as another hunter who shouldn't have been there came into my field of vision. I dropped my gun and glared at him. He should not have been there without permission. I saw him just as I was ready to pull the trigger....... Had I shot him (he was about 30 yards away) he may have suffered more than Dick Cheney's friend due to the shot size and gunpowder load used for duck hunting. Had I shot him it would have been a terrible experience for both of us. Right or wrong, the correct action would have been to administer first aid and call an ambulance. The thought of calling the press would not have been considered, and if law enforcement would have been called it would have been to help, although I am sure they would have taken a statement from all involved. If the news guys did come by, it would have been my choice to allow an interview or not. Why is Dick Cheney not allowed the same consideration as any other citizen? I would be apalled if the news media had told me I should have informed them and it was not my right to determine if I should allow an interview about my private affairs. As usual, you decide.

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02 March 06 - 23:06Three's Company

My wife has been watching television. Hildale, Utah and Colorado City, Arizona (actually one contiguous community) are in the news as a result of the polygamist orientation of those who live there. Manti, Utah is apparently another polygamist haven, to the north of these towns. They are both in the sticks and off the road well traveled. Here is a website giving excellent insight into the practice of polygamy. My take on this is that the liberals are very soon going to have to embrace this practice. Why? Because liberals seem to support gay marriages and the like. It would be hypocritical for liberals to support gay behavior and not support "group marriages" since the reason for legally banning either type of relationship is the judeo-christian philosophy on which we founded our country. In general liberals support what might be called humanistic secularism over religion when it comes to the good of others. If I can believe the website I linked above, the laws banning polygamy are mostly based om federal law which prohibits polygamy, does not provide legal recognition of polygamy, and defines marriage as one man, and one woman. Since this one man and one woman concept seems to be under attack by the liberals amoung us, it would seem that polygamy should eventually be considered just another "lifestyle" in the liberal way of life. There are other sites with varied views on this. Simply Google "colorado city polygamy." Hey, maybe the ACLU will stick up for these folks. After all, the more the merrier!

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01 March 06 - 23:39New Antivirus Time

My antivirus software just expired and needed to be replaced. On a whim I decided to try a new antivirus software listed on the Microsoft site called F-Secure. The Microsoft site lists quite a few choices here: Antivirus Software I was rather impressed that this software (F-Secure) ferrets out both viruses and adware. On my wife's computer we have been using the free McAffee software from AOL and the other free AOL stuff along with Microsoft Firewall. The F-Secure software found 9 files associated with Trojan adware on my wife's computer. It is not just a matter of you get what you pay for since the F-secure is free for 6 months. Also, F-Secure has this really cool map of virus activity they have logged. You might find it interesting. Just bear in mind that the times are Helsinki time when you look at it! Check here: F-Secure Virus Map

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